News Roundup for 3/19/12

Tom Corbett: Fighting truth, justice, and the American Way

-Headline of the Day-
"112% wrong in Pennsylvania."

When last we saw Pennsylvania Space Cadet Gov. Tom Corbett, he was handily defeating the evil forces of Ladies Who Get Abortions. Armed only with his slow wit and keen sense of the exact wrong thing to say, resourceful Tom fended off critics of his ultrasound bill by telling them, "I don't know how you make anybody watch. You just have to close your eyes" -- easily to proving to one and all that he has absolutely no understanding of the basis of that criticism.

Now, we find Cadet Corbett fighting another ruthless and villainous foe -- Citizens Who Want to Vote. When some of this ravenous horde asked why a voter ID law he signed was necessary, he let them have it. "When some of the precincts come in with a 112 percent reporting you have to scratch your head and say how does that happen?" he declared.

Where does this figure come from? Straight out of Corbett's trusty Astro-Utility Butt. Notes Steve Benen, "Corbett was Pennsylvania's state Attorney General, and before that, a U.S. Attorney. If he had found evidence of such obvious fraud, he had opportunities to investigate and prosecute. That never happened, because the fraud never took place."

Pennsylvania Space Cadet Gov. Tom Corbett; fighting truth wherever it rears its ugly head! (Maddow Blog)


-GOP strikes another righteous blow in the War on Women-



Now run along and knit baby clothes or needlepoint a pie or whatever the hell it is you women do when you're not eating fistfuls of abortion pills. (GoComics)


-Bonus HotD-
"Santorum Accepts Blessing After Pastor Tells All Buddhists, Muslims to Git Outta US."

Greenwell Springs (LA) Baptist Church pastor and Santorum-backer Dennis Terry says that America is Christians only and everyone else has to get the hell out! And Rick's just super-happy to take his endorsement and his magic blessing.

Can we get some media over  here to ask him if he agrees with Pastor Terry?

No? OK, under the rug it goes. (Wonkette, with video)

News Roundup for 3/15/12

PA Gov. Tom Corbett

-Headline of the Day-
"Dems Hammer PA Governor Over Ultrasound Comments."

Let's go straight to the money shot on this one: "I don’t know how you make anybody watch. You just have to close your eyes."

That's Pennsylvania Governor Tom Corbett, who is both a Republican and a famous Space Cadet. What Cadet Tom is talking about here is Pennsylvania's ultrasound bill, which would force women to undergo an unnecessary procedure (at heir own expense) in order to get an abortion.

See, the thinking behind ultrasound bills is pretty simple: women are stupid. Women get abortions because they have absolutely no idea what's up in there. So, if you show them a picture of it, maybe they won't have an abortion.

"If you’re a woman who opposes mandatory ultrasounds, Republican Pennsylvania Governor Tom Corbett has a suggestion for you: ‘You just have to close your eyes,’" writes the Democratic Governors Association. "‘Close your eyes?’ Does Governor Corbett have no shame?"

He's a Republican. Since when have they known shame? (Talking Points Memo)


-More ultrasound ultra-fun-



Remember ladies, having government poke around in your uterus is liberty! (Truthdig)


-Bonus HotD-
"At NCAA Tournament, Southern Miss Band Chants ‘Where’s Your Green Card?’ At Hispanic Kansas State Player."

Because they're classy like that. (ThinkProgress, with video)