Cherie Blair spots an error in a news story
-All the news that isn't-
Regret the Error has decided on their Correction of the Year, a dubious honor recognizing news outlets that are forced to clean up after really lousy reporting. This year's winner comes from the UK's Independent Saturday magazine. You don't have to read the story to surmise that it was complete crap.
Following the portrait of Tony and Cherie Blair published on 21 April in the Independent Saturday magazine, Ms Blair's representatives have told us that she was friendly with but never had a relationship with Carole Caplin of the type suggested in the article. They want to make it clear, which we are happy to do, that Ms Blair "has never shared a shower with Ms Caplin, was not introduced to spirit guides or primal wrestling by Ms Caplin (or anyone else), and did not have her diary masterminded by Ms Caplin."
What the hell is "primal wrestling?" I know Blair has a reputation for being screwy, but come on...
What sells this one for me is that they're so "happy" to make the correction after reporting such crazy-assed bullshit. Go read the runners-up to see why you should always take news stories with a grain of salt. For instance, the Sentinel-Review of Woodstock, Ontario ran a retraction of a story about a man volunteering to go to Afghanistan. "Kevin DeClark is going to Afghanistan to gain life experience to become a police officer when he returns, not to shoot guns and blow things up," they wrote. "The Sentinel-Review apologizes for any embarrassment this may have caused."
Yeah, "They made me seem like a bloodthirsty psychopath -- how embarrassing!" Did I say a grain of salt? I meant one of those big fifty pound salt licks they give cows. (Regret the Error)
-Like a Knock-Knock joke gone horribly, horribly wrong
A radio station in Cork, Ireland was running a radio contest. Cork 96FM challenged listeners to come up with words that weren't in the dictionary but could, nevertheless, be used in a sentence. The winner would get a trip to Bali. That led to this exchange:
DJ: 96FM here, what's your name?
Caller: Hi, me name's Dave.
DJ: Dave, what's your word?
Caller: Goan... spelt G-O-A-N, pronounced "go-an."
DJ:... You are correct, Dave, "goan" is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?
Caller: Goan fuck yourself!
That didn't go over too well; the DJ dropped the call and took a few more. Later, a caller offered the word "smee." Asked to use it in a sentence, the caller said, "Smee again! Goan fuck yourself!"
I don't think Dave won. (LoversPleasureShop.com, via reddit)
-Subheader of the day-
Headline, "Rancher takes a stand." Subheader, "Civil War battles. A concert. Motocross. Topless photo sessions. Welcome to the Wooden Nickel Ranch, where county officials want to rein things in."
California rancher Tom Fuhrman is in trouble for "holding events not normal for a residential area without proper permits." There are abnormal event permits? Other abnormal events include "church retreats and Boy Scout meetings." Apparently not during the topless photo shoots, though.
Too bad. Now that would be a news story -- "Topless motocross civil war photoshoot offends church members and Boy Scouts." It's got everything but a missing white girl. (Press-Enterprise)
