I will oppose any attempt by Sen. Rand Paul to father a moose-baby

Rand Paul is putting his foot down — and hoping the Washington press corps is watching. As the above Politico headline demonstrates, they are. Here’s the gist of things:

Politico: Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul said Friday he will strongly oppose an attempt by President Obama to bailout the city of Detroit.

“I basically say he is bailing them out over my dead body because we don’t have any money in Washington,” Paul said in an interview with Breitbart.com.

Has the White House said they were going to bail out the City of Detroit? Not in so many word, but if you read between the lines, the oh-so subtle word from the White House is "NO!!”

Detroit News: The White House reiterated Friday that no federal bailout for Detroit is in the works, but said the adminstration wants to be helpful as the Motor City restructures in bankruptcy.

White House spokesman Jay Carney said on the issue of Detroit’s insolvency that is “something local leaders and creditors are going to have resolve, but we will be partners in an effort to assist the city and the state as they move forward.” Asked for specifics on what type of assistance might be available, Carney declined to elaborate.

“The issue here of the insolvency and dealing with that is one that Detroit and Detroit’s creditors will have to resolve. We will be of assistance in general, both in terms of policy as well as just being a partner with Detroit as Detroit finds its way and moves forward in the coming weeks, months and years,” Carney said.

And this isn’t the first time it’s come up — Detroit’s been inching toward bankruptcy since the Republican Governor took control of the city’s finances away from city government and placed it in the hands of an “emergency manager," who applied the super-awesome Republican economic policies that totally failed to save the city. This guy and Detroit’s mayor had already gone to the White House to discuss the city’s problems and this was the result, according to the same Detroit News piece (emphasis mine):

White House officials including Obama senior adviser Valerie Jarrett, Housing and Urban Development Secretary Shaun Donovan and National Economic Council director Gene Sperling have been in talks with city and state leaders. In April, Jarrett made it clear to Detroit Mayor Dave Bing and Emergency Manager Kevyn Orr at a White House meeting that no federal bailout was forthcoming.

So the White House keeps saying over and over — for months — that they aren’t going to bail out Detroit, which Rand Paul takes as his cue to stand boldly and proudly against any bailout for Detroit.

And that’s why I say I will oppose any attempt by Rand Paul to father a moose-baby. Rand Paul has never actually said he wouldn’t father a moose-baby, which makes my opposition to the attempt more rational than his stand against a Detroit bailout.