Proving Herman Cain's innocence -- through science!
-Headline of the Day-
"Great Moments In Journalism: Local News Finds Sharon Bialek To Be Lying Via Voice Analysis Software."
Herman Cain is the finest man to ever walk the earth and the lady accusing him of sexual misconduct is terrible. Everyone knows it. It's not worth discussing.
Still, some crazy drug-addled hippies out there think Herman is the terrible one, so CBS Atlanta was on the job, digging for the truth like their heroes -- Jimmy Olsen and Lois Lane. They grabbed a video of Bialek's press conference and took it to a super-science guy. Super-science guy (who's also a private detective) ran it through voice recognition software and learned that her pants were on fire. It's all "very scientific," assures cub reporter Peter Parker, AKA Mike Paluska.
There's just one little problem. According to the report, "CBS Atlanta failed to point out that there remains controversy amongst the science community in the reliability of voice stress analysis tests despite their wide use among law enforcement. 'A number of federally sponsored studies have found little or no scientific evidence to support the notion that existing voice-stress technologies are capable of consistently detecting lies and deceptions,' according to a report by Washington University in St. Louis." Of course, that's because these are all Ivory Tower Intellectuals who want all criminals to get away.
Even the pinkos at the Department of Defense think voice analysis is hooey. A
1996 report (pdf) found that the odds of getting a correct finding from a Computer Voice Stress Analyzer were "not significantly different from chance." In fact, in their study it was
worse than chance, by virtue of being correct on a lying/not lying question only 48% of the time -- i.e., wrong more often than right.
So I'd say the "proof" that Herman Cain is innocent is a tad bit sketchy. In fact, if you want to play the Defense Department's odds, these results are a better indication of his guilt. (
Mediaite)
-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, have you heard about this "Super Committee" thing? It's a
bunch of people who are going to fix America by solving the things that aren't the big problem.
Click for animation
Maybe they should just fight crime or something... (
MarkFiore.com)
-Bonus HotD-
"Perry: 'If we're electing the debater in chief, don't elect me.'"
You've got a deal. (
The Hill)
