News Roundup for 11/1/11

"Ask me about my sex scandal -- please!"

-Headline of the Day-
"Mark Block Won't Talk About the Other Cain Scandal."

Did you know there were not one, but two scandals following the Herman Cain Train around like a black cloud? It's true! First, there's the sexy boom-chaka-wow-wow sexy sexual harassment sexy scandal broken by Politico and then there's some boring old money-laundering scandal broken by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. One's pretty serious and the other's really serious -- like someone could go to jail serious. So all the news networks are following Cain around with microphones, wondering why he won't shut up about the sexy boom-chaka-wow-wow sexy sexual harassment sexy scandal -- because they're smart like that.

Anyway, it turns out that if -- on the off-chance -- someone accidentally asks the Cain Train about the money-laundering scandal, they run into a brick wall. "We've retained independent counsel to look at the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel story," campaign manager Mark Block told a reporter when asked about it. What's that mean? You guys hire a lawyer or Sherlock Holmes or what? When asked again, Block gave pretty much the same answer.

When asked a third time, he said, "Why don't we talk about the campaign going forward?"

Or, if you don't want to talk about that, he's probably more than happy to talk about the sexy boom-chaka-wow-wow sexy sexual harassment sexy scandal. "Cain's campaign manager was once suspended from election work in Wisconsin because of election law violations," writes Dave Weigel. "He can't or won't talk now about more possible violations. It might be better for the Cain campaign if we all focus on Politico's story."

That's the sexy boom-chaka-wow-wow sexy sexual harassment sexy scandal, BTW. So if you're a journalist, make sure you ask Team Cain all about that one, OK?

I know they'd sure appreciate it. (Weigel)


-Subtle variations make all the difference-


Click to embiggen

(Truthdig)


-Bonus HotD-
"Ann Coulter On Herman Cain: Our Blacks Are Better Than Their Blacks."

For future reference, it's probably a bad idea for white people to refer to black people as a group in possessive terms -- given US history and all.

Try to keep that in mind, Annie. (Mediaite)

News Roundup for 5/26/11

OK, done

-Headline of the day-
"Dane County judge strikes down collective bargaining law."

Gov. Scott Walker and Wisconsin Republicans are having a real rough week. First, they found out that polls aren't going their way. Now, the big piece of legislation that started the whole thing is dead in the water.

According to the report, "a Dane County judge has struck down Gov. Scott Walker's legislation repealing most collective bargaining for public employees." Why? Because they broke open meetings laws to jam the thing through and it turns out that breaking laws is illegal -- or some liberal, judicial activism crap like that.

Circuit Judge Maryann Sumi issued a 33 page decision (pdf) overturning the law. "The Legislature and its committees are bound to comply with the open meetings law by their own choice. Having made that choice, they cannot now shield themselves from the provisions that give the law force and effect," she wrote.

In other words, you guys wrote the law -- what the hell are you complaining about?

Anyhoo, off it goes through the appeals process. If it survives, it'll probably be just in time for Scott Walker's recall replacement to repeal it. (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel)


-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, did you hear about that scary Supreme Court ruling that says California has to let a bunch of people out of prison? No? Well, Uncle Mark will tell us all about it!


Click for animation

You know, if prison were the last resort for most offenders, instead of the first, then maybe they wouldn't have all these problems.

But then, what would the private prison industry do? (MarkFiore.com)


-Bonus HotD-
"House GOP Staffers Floated Using Taxpayer Money To Promote Paul Ryan's Budget."

Because it's all about protecting the taxpayers and reducing the deficit, right? (ThinkProgress)

Stories to Watch: 4/7/11

Nothing much going on. How about you? Now here's the news...


The election night that would not die: vote count corrections are popping up all over the state of Wisconsin. Go here, scroll down to the updates at the end of the article, and keep your hands away from your hair.


Wait a second. Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reports that Prosser picked up 7,582 votes from Waukesha County. There's reason to doubt the veracity of this previously unknown cache of votes; Waukesha County Clerk Kathy Nickolaus is a Republican activist and she's previously been under scrutiny for her handling of election data.


Gay caveman! You'll never look at Fred and Barney the same way again.


Defunding Planned Parenthood and crippling the EPA are the hills Republicans have chosen to die on.


The question (almost) no one's asking: does a government shutdown have a price tag? Yeah, it does. And it's hefty. Kind of makes Republican claims that they're being forced into a shutdown by "fiscal irresponsibility" ring a little hollow, doesn't it?


Finally, what you already knew is now confirmed: the New Black Panther case was pretty much bullshit.

News Roundup for 4/7/11

Tool used to determine Wisconsin election results

-Headline of the Day-
"Winnebago County vote-count change alters Supreme Court race."

Aw crap. Turns out the Associated Press misreported some numbers from Winnebago County and JoAnne Kloppenburg takes a hit. The new, revised count puts incumbent Supreme Court Justice David Prosser in the lead by 40 votes. That's right now as I'm writing this. Could change in a minute.

See these numbers aren't final either. According to the report, AP "is working to reach the Winnebago County clerk, but the clerk is participating in the canvass of the vote and has not returned a message." So something's going on up there.

In any case, a recount is definitely in the cards. When the difference in the totals is less than half a percent, you can call for a recount at the state's expense. I think 40 votes meets that criteria under anyone's definition of "easily."

But before that, all the votes have to be verified, which means these stories may bust out again occasionally -- Kloppenburg up, Prosser up, Kloppenburg up, etc. It's election night all over again.

"Keep in mind that spreadsheet errors and adjustments happen in nearly every election -- but most elections aren't so close that people start to notice or care," writes Eric Kleefeld for Talking Points Memo. "And once all of them are discovered, they often tend to roughly balance out and only barely move the numbers. Then again, in an election this close, even a tiny movement of the numbers could have an effect.

"But bottom line: We didn't truly know who won the election on Wednesday, and we don't know right now, either. It's probably going to be a while."

Settle in, folks. (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel)


-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, scary people want to do bad things to America! Should we be tough or should we wuss out?


Click for animation

OK, so I guess we're going with "wuss" then? (MarkFiore.com)


-Bonus HotD-
"Idaho Rejects Rape Exception In Abortion Bill Because 'The Hand Of The Almighty' Was At Work."

I don't think I like Republican's Rape God very much... (ThinkProgress)

News Roundup for 2/7/11

Not a real porn star

-Headline of the day-
"Christina Aguilera wasn't the first one to botch the national anthem."

But she was the latest. In case you missed it, the former Mickey Mouse Club cutie-turned fake porn star got to sing the Star Spangled Banner at the Super Bowl and didn't do so well. According to the report, "Repeating a line and flipping a word she sang 'What so proudly we watched at the twilight's last gleaming' instead of' 'O'er the ramparts we watch were so gallantly streaming.'"

You know what? The Packers won.

I say do it that way all the time. (War Room)


-Yes, it is called "Titletown"-
This morning's Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.



I guess a lot of people woke up feeling a little hungover today. In other words, just a normal Wisconsin day. (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel)


-Bonus HotD-
"The Brewing Kristol, Beck Feud."

In a rare moment of lucidity, Bill Kristol says that Glenn Beck is crazy for thinking that a popular uprising in Egypt is part of China's plan to take over New Zealand (no, really. Glenn says this). So, of course, Beck has an on-air meltdown over it.

And so the battle between the neocon GOP establishment and the fruitcake base begins. Frankly, I couldn't care less who wins. They're both just as crazy.

Enjoy the show! (Political Animal)