News Roundup for 8/10/11

Ron Paul supporters arrive in Iowa

-Headline of the Day-
"Ron Paul busing 30 family members in to Iowa."

One of the more entertaining aspects of watching Paulistas is their habit of creating realities that they later celebrate. You'll check in on a messageboard or a comment thread on Reddit and you'll see a link to an online poll or something about who's gonna win what race in what state sometime maybe. All the Paulistas will rush off to totally skew the poll in their direction, then they'll later point to the poll as proof that RON PAUL IS DEFINITELY GONNA WIN!! They have as good a grasp on the concepts of logic, evidence, and cause and effect as their creationist, global-warming-denier hero. Seriously, when you look at it objectively [ED: get it?], it's freakin' hilarious.

Anyway, the latest adventure in manipulating reality so that RON PAUL IS DEFINITELY GONNA WIN comes from the Great Man Himself, Ron Paul. In order to make sure that he comes out near the top in the Iowa straw poll, Ron's packing up 30 "sons, daughters, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and more" to the Hawkeye State to wander around "wearing their Ron Paul T-shirts" and "their Ron Paul dresses" and probably hats and pants and buttons and tattoos on their foreheads. Then all the Iowans are going to look around and say, "Wow, this Ron Paul guy is just super-popular -- I'm gonna hop on that bandwagon! All these people who coincidentally look like Ron Paul can't be wrong!"

And then Paul wins the Iowa straw poll, which automatically makes him the President of the United States. After that, we all live in a Libertarian paradise -- like Somalia.

You ever hear that phrase, "That's so crazy it just might work?"

Yeah, that's always bullshit. (Politico)


-Speaking of logic and evidence-
Some miracles just cannot be explained.


Click to embiggen

Clearly, this young man is a prophet. (SMBC)


-Bonus HotD-
"Wis. Dems: The Recalls Were A Win For Us!"

Wisconsin dem chairman Mike Tate: "[How can Walker] claim this is a real victory for him and his agenda, when his party lost two senators on his watch to recall elections? How can that be a win for Scott Walker when he lost two seats?"

Math always seems to hate Republicans as much as Republicans hate math. (Talking Points Memo)

News Roundup for 3/24/11

CONFIRMED: this ain't much of a lock

-Headline of the day-
"CONFIRMED: Obama Locked Out of White House."

As far as wingnut blogger Jim Hoft is concerned, it has been CONFIRMED that President Obama was locked out of the White House today. Seems he came back from Brazil earlier than expected and found a door locked.

Hahahahaha! The President of the United States, locked out of his own house! Hahahahaha! Clearly, he's the worst president ever!. Remember, this has been CONFIRMED! CONFIRMED!!

Here's what it looks like when the most powerful man on Earth gets locked out of his house:



He tries one door, it's locked. He tries the other -- pop, right in. This is being "locked out" in much the same way that using a pair of scissors to open a stubborn bag of chips is "starving to death."

But never mind that, he was locked out! It's CONFIRMED!!! (Gateway Pundit)


-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, we hear a lot about "smart bombs," but what if there were...


Click for animation

Oh sure, go and use the word "smart" correctly... (MarkFiore.com)


-Bonus HotD-
"'I'm through whining about a liberal press,' says Sarah Palin."

Unfortunately, this statement was made while whining about a "liberal press." No really. Go check for yourself.

At least she admits it's whining. (The Hill)