FOX News host, Osama bin Laden
-Special treatment?-
Paris Hilton's out of jail and under house arrest after 3 days. If you're Paris Hilton, being grounded ain't such a bad deal -- the house she arrested in has to be fabulous! I posted yesterday that she was already freaking out after only 35 hours behind bars. Now she's out. "Aha!" you're tempted to say, "'Rich and white' is the same as a 'Throw a Tantrum and Get Out of Jail Free' card!"
Not so fast. From a May 11 story in the LA Times, "Despite being sentenced to 45 days in county jail for violating her probation, socialite Paris Hilton is expected to spend three weeks -- and perhaps much less -- behind bars, Los Angeles County sheriff's officials told The Times on Thursday."
OK, three freakin' days is a lot shorter than predicted, but there ya go. It turns out LA County jails are so overcrowded that non-violent offenders tend to serve only so long as their bed isn't needed for a psychopath. In Hilton's case, that was three days. So Paris gets grounded and LA puts some violent offender behind bars. I'm not saying she didn't manage to get herself bumped up on the list by claiming some mental emergency, but she would've been out early regardless.
In related news, Scooter Libby is asking a judge to transfer his sentence to the LA County Jail. (LA Times)
-It wouldn't surprise me any...-
Olmstead Falls, OH resident Thomas Potter wants the government to cough up $25 million in reward for finding Osama bin Laden. Using an internet directory, Potter traced bin Laden to what some would argue is a very likely place. "The first listing put the al Qaeda leader at the California headquarters of media giant FOX Entertainment Group," the report reads. Considering how often FOX News tries to freak people out, having a terrorist on the payroll doesn't seem all that farfetched. Bet he shares a locker with Bill O'Reilly. (ABC News)
-Headline of the day-
"Woman Arrested for Making Faces at Dog." Seriously. I got nuthin' to add... (AP)
-Now this is just sad...-
Actual headline, "Alan Keyes Backs 'Draft Alan Keyes' Movement." Failed presidential candidate, right wing nutjob, and the guy who's ass was kicked by Barack Obama is being 'drafted' by a website designed to "determine and rally support for a presidential candidacy by Dr. Keyes."
"Designed by whom?" you might ask. "The effort is spearheaded by several individuals at RenewAmerica, a grassroots organization affiliated with Keyes," the report tells us. Hell, I always thought RenewAmerica was founded by Keyes. In fact, that's exactly the case.
How much does this remind you of the kid who desperately wants to avoid being the last one picked for a baseball team? I'd feel sorry for him, but he's such a dick. (Right Wing Watch)
