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Wednesday, February 29, 2012

News Roundup for 2/29/12

Rudolph Valentino
Rick Santorum

-Headline of the Day-
"Does Rick Santorum Have a Problem With the Ladies?"

I know it's hard to believe, because he's got all the moves of a white Smoove B, but Rick Santorum may not be connecting with the fairer sex. And by "may not be," I mean "isn't."

You'd think they'd like all that stuff about how they should stay at home and have emotions and have babies and never have birth control or college educations, but they don't. It's a puzzler. According to the report, "A Michigan exit poll showed former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney garnered support from 43 percent of women voters compared to 38 percent for Santorum. With Romney notching such a narrow victory there, the margin among women is enough to be the difference. A poll taken a week before the Arizona contest showed women picking Romney over Santorum by a 2-to-1 margin."

Rick's plan so far is to talk about his wife and his mom a lot -- I guess to prove that there are women out their who can stomach love him. If that doesn't work, expect campaign ads with soft music and candlelight. "C'mon over here and let me talk some sweet, sweet capital gains tax cuts, bay-bee. Boom chaka wow-wow..." (US News)

-Speaking of Rick-

Santorum cartoon
Click for full strip

Santorum 2012; because a dumber America is possible. (

-Bonus HotD-
"Wall Street Bonus Drop Means Trading Aspen for Discount Cereal."

In which the Wall Street one-percenters complain they don't have enough money. "Paid a lower bonus, [Andrew Schiff, director of marketing for broker-dealer Euro Pacific Capital Inc.] said the $350,000 he earns, enough to put him in the country’s top 1 percent by income, doesn’t cover his family’s private-school tuition, a Kent, Connecticut, summer rental and the upgrade they would like from their 1,200-square- foot Brooklyn duplex," the report tells us. Sounds awful.

But this is the fun part:

“People who don’t have money don’t understand the stress,” said Alan Dlugash, a partner at accounting firm Marks Paneth & Shron LLP in New York who specializes in financial planning for the wealthy. “Could you imagine what it’s like to say I got three kids in private school, I have to think about pulling them out? How do you do that?”

Maybe you can cut back on Lear jet polish? Then again, I probably don't understand the stress of having money.(Bloomberg)

-The Rare Bonus Bonus HotD-
"The Five Best Quotes in Bloomberg’s Outrageous Banker Bonuses Story."

In case you just want the good parts and a really funny stressed Wall-Streeter photo. (Gawker)
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